My favourite part of the year is over.
Living in one of the greyest parts of the world I cherish what it is we call
summer. By which I mean: some sort of summery weather. If we’re lucky, it
starts around May and ends somewhere in October. Sounds good? Well… Foreigners often joke that we don’t have any
seasons, that it is just grey and dreary all year around. But having lived here
for most of my life I’m able to see the silver lining: there is a difference
from one part of the year to the other! That’s why I feel free to take the
liberty to label such a long chunk of the year as ‘summery’. Everything is
relative.
This year we had a summer that wasn’t bad
at all. It didn’t start off too good, spring was rather cold and June was still
rather chilly but at least there wasn’t much rain. But then July and August: they were wonderful, marvellous….
Often I found myself walking or cycling around
town thinking life should always be this way: to step out of my front door and
feel happy, just by feeling warm air on my skin. Not to ever be bothered
thinking about bringing a jacket is high on my list of priorities.
Then it starts sneaking in: temperatures drop,
days get longer until it gets to the point where I leave the house in the
morning in the dark and get back home under the same circumstances. That’s when
I start to feel again as if life is just passing me by and there’s nothing I
can do about it. Nothing to do but just wait patiently. Bear with it until that
day, where I leave my house in the morning and suddenly notice the sun has
started to rise earlier. I like to pretend the birds serenade me on my way to
work. That is the moment everything feels lighter and easier again. After all,
days have been getting longer from late December on without me realising it..
Leaves me with a good six months of the
year to struggle through. But what a
waste of precious time, this feeling of being stuck in time! I’ve wondered if
it is possible to transfer that summery feeling to another part of the year.
To be happy to just walk out of the door? And to feel the crisp air on my skin,
or raindrops? So far, no positive outcome: I only feel like rushing home after
work and hide away. Not with an entire sense of unhappiness; it’s all just so
bland. With a long, dark grey winter ahead of me that I’m pessimistic
about I’m unsure what to do. I keep reading about the subject “How to
live my life purpose”. Till I have to conclude that I’m spending an awful lot of time reading instead of doing
whatever it is I’m supposed to do!
Martin Seligman is one of the founders of
Positive Psychology. Dr. Seligman and his co founders thought psychology should
not only heal the illness, but also build on strengths that all humans carry
within them. He has concluded psychology helps people to feel better about
themselves. It seems that 60 % of our chances to be happy is up to genetics,
while the remaining 40 % is in our own
hands. Now that’s catching my attention! I’m basically a happy person, how can
I be happier?
Three different types of life are being
distinguished: 1) A Pleasant Life; Where you have as much fun as you can. 2) A
Good Life; Where you have found engagement and inspiration in what you do with
your day. 3) A Meaningful Life: Where you know what your strengths are and how
to use them.
The outcome shows that the Pleasant Life
barely has any influence on positive emotions. Dr. Seligman compares it to the
cream and the cherry on top of the cake. First make sure your life is one with
meaning and engagement, the rest will follow.
Sources:
·
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/09/16/happiness-habits-of-exuberant-human-beings_n_3909772.html
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